Post Move Anxiety: Mind Has Not Caught Up Yet

I have gotten a good deal of work done with my house this extended weekend. But I have also committed to getting some good rest. I not only deserved it, but I physically and psychologically needed it. I have been going pretty much non-stop since early July. An extremely eventful and life-changing two months. Really great things too. But my god...the pace.

Plenty more to do today. It will be a long day. I'm glad for the day off tomorrow. My mind has not quite caught up with this newer reality of getting settled. I still feel the anxiety of starting a  new job and moving into a new home. It reminds of college finals. After the momentum of studying non-stop for so long, you finish with you studying and exam taking and then it just ends. But your mind and body have not caught up with the abrupt end. They are still in cramming-anxiety, non-stop for weeks mode. That's me now. College finals did serve a purpose after all. Practice for real life shit.

Well done, college.

New Home, New Town, Now Job

Well, I'm here. The first chance I have had to sit down and write. I've been that busy. I really don't even have the time now. But I wanted to get something in and posted to my crappy blog.

I'm a home owner now. Kinda. The house hasn't technically closed yet. There shouldn't be any problems but not counting my chickens yet. Should be within the next few weeks.

I worry. It's kind of what I do.

But I love the new job. The transition has been difficult. Don't love my new house. But it's better than renting, and I plan to upgrade ASAP. I really don't want to be stuck here.

Some new weirdness and problems living in the same town as my ex. Those will pass. Part of the transition, I'm hoping.

Speed Packing Marathon...They Suck

The speed packing is progressing. Still overwhelmed and worried I won't finish in time, but I have no choice; so I will. I'm at the point where I am just throwing things in boxes and even heavy duty garbage bags. I have gotten a good deal done in a short amount of time. I've been riding on the seat of my pants for a long time (over a month), but with a plan. And things have been coming together, long and short term. Just have to keep plugging away.

I see some kind of end in sight. About 6 hours until I start loading the truck. I can get a good deal done in that time.

Thank You, Past Me

I felt the need to write again this morning. Been going non-stop, and writing always helps me to let go, iron out mind clutter, and feel rejuvenated. Never really fully understood way, even after years of formal study and research into writing.

But it's the act of writing itself that is important, regardless of the intellectual "why".

In full move/pack mode. I feel behind, but I can and will do this. I was looking through older posts, and I came across a couple where I was similarly overwhelmed and did not know how I would fit in the time. This one in particular spoke tome. I came through those moments...and I came through them triumphantly. Looking back helped to remind me of that.

Thanks, past me, for writing those posts, which are helping preset me to feel less stressed and that I can do this.

Last Post From This House?

This very well could be my last post at my current residence. In the house I moved to after my ex and I separated. The house I learned how to be a single parent to twin boys. The house I lived in when my divorce was finalized.

I also got a better job from this house. I applied to many, as recorded on this blog. I actually spent a lot of my free time searching and applying to jobs. I mentioned I was offered and accepted a new one. And that was good. But then after I accepted, I got called in for another interview. There were a lot of things I liked about this job, so I decided to at least go to the interview. A week later, they offered me the positions, and I accepted.

This was good too. It just made things very complicated. Letting the prior new position know I was taking a different job elsewhere was the easy part. And they were very cool about the hole thing. The really hard part of going through the process again on finding a new home and day care for my boys. I also and working very hard to sublet the place I signed a lease for the prior position I accepted and then rejected. Trying to find a sub-leaser sucks, and is time consuming. And pretty scary. If I can't find someone I'm screwed. But I have been pep-talking myself that this will happen. I keep finding people to show the townhouse too. Hoping one will come together soon! Some promising ones in the next couple days. People with bad credit are killing me (like really bad credit), or I would have found someone already.

Finding a new day care was also one of the easier things to do. I was really worried about that too. But I got that taken care of quickly.

And the really big news: instead of renting, I bought a home. Yes, that is right, I bought a very modest home. It just sort of came together. I was not initially looking to do so right away. But an opportunity fell into my lap. However, it's about as good as any rental home I would find, and I won't be throwing away money on rent. And I have hopes of leasing out the property in a year or so and buying a better home.

I have come a long way this year financially.

But the process was also very time consuming. I have been crazy-busy all the time for more than a month.

I will move into my new home Sunday. And I still have tons of packing to do. Wasting time writing a blog is probably not the best way to spend my time right now. I am actually moving in before I close on the house. That is basically how I was even able to pull this off.

And then, I start my new job Monday.

Holy shit.

If I think about it all at once, it is too much. I just take it step by step systematically. But is is also a juggling act.

Back to it now. Project speed pack. I can do this!